Hilarious Letter From Teacher to Students On the Last Day of School


This article was written by Andy McCall. Andy is in his 9th year teaching, and does everything to honor his little girl, Penelope, who passed last year. Check him out on his Blog or on Facebook: Penelope's Path.
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If teachers could be completely frank...
Dear Class,
We’ve spent almost 180 days together. It seems like only yesterday, I was introducing myself and trying to figure out which one was Dan and the other Don. I still mess it up, but you understand. I just wanted to give you a few words of wisdom before you leave for summer and forget pretty much everything that came out of my mouth.
1. Only Dab when you sneeze. If you do it any time else, a worksheet will magically appear under your pillow.
2. Just to clear it up, yes you still need to learn your multiplication facts and how to regroup in subtraction because I don’t have the patience much longer to stand in line for 15 minutes at Food city again because this little girl can’t figure out how to make change when the computer goes down.
3. I taught you how to use your/you’re and their/there/they’re correctly. Remember this or you’ll get made fun of on Facebook later in life and/or your boss won’t find it too impressive in your request for a raise.
4. Throw that fidget spinner away immediately. In 15 years when you are cleaning out your room at your parent’s house you’ll find them like I did my POGS and hide them so no one knew you thought they were super cool and how you’d share them with your kids one day.
5. Don’t put that slime under your bed and forget about it. Just trust me on this one.
6. When you see me this summer it’s okay to wave from a distance. Don’t come running at me like a raging bull in a china shop. My hands are probably full of wine or beer and I can’t hug you anyway.
7. Please, every time you have a water bottle at home, flip it. Flip it so many times in front of your parents that it becomes so boring, and you get so grounded, that you never do it again! Then, like the rest of the world should do, just recycle it.
8. Read something. I don’t care what it is but don’t lose everything we worked for. This might help when you go to the beach and the sign says “NO SWIMMING” and you read “GO SWIMMING”
9. There is this new video game called “GO OUTSIDE, PLAY, GET BRUISES, and GET DIRTY”. Ask your parents where to find it. I have multiple copies in the room if you need it.
10. Just remember I love each one of you. Some I might show with high fives, and others with that “What in the World were you thinking” look on my face, daily. I’m proud of your work, whether it was National Honor Society or bottom of the fridge worthy. I gave you my best that I had every day, and I hope one day you’ll appreciate that. You are special, unique, and have a lot to offer the world. Never lose that. Instead, lose the fidget spinners. You will always be one of my kids and I will never forget that, for whatever reason that may be. Treat each other right and keep on trucking.
-Your Favorite Teacher EVER
I find it hilarious the number of typos in the comments. We are all idiots.
That is nowhere NEAR what I would right to one of my classes if I could say anything and not get fired/arrested.
Dear Students ,
You are all the brightest in the school because you signed up for a business class. Oh and you signed up for Financial literacy . ! What’s the most important thing in like ? Money ? Why?Regardless of what path you choose in life you need to know how to manage your Money You need it to survive. Cut out Maslow’s hierarchy of needs Pyramid and put it on your refrigerator. Never take it down .
You will always remember how important it is to be financially responsible Lucky for you not only am I a Business Teacher , I have 10 years in Finance at JP Morgan Chase . You are earning from an expert . Unfortunately, our Federal and State Government no longer requires Business as a Core course so I will always be a substitute teacher and we most likely will not meet again . Therefore I now have 40 minutes to teach you everything you need to know ! The purpose of a teacher is to produce a productive citizen. In order for a citizen to be productive he must contribute to the economy. As soon as you graduate and turn 18 start voting and change the policy on Business as a core course. You need future students to be productive citizens and contribute to the economy for your benefit, Otherwise America will never see Economic Prosperity again. Why are you the brightest student in the school? You signed up form Business class, in particular Financial literacy . Which ever career path you take you need to know how to manage your money . You don’t need to know how to bake cookies from required classFamily Consumer Science. Perhaps learning how to do laundry or grill a steak. But you do need know where your refrigerator is to put Maslow’s hierarchy of needs Pyamind on it. ENJOY CHANGING THE WORLD – Your 42 minute Friday Substitute Teacher
I was laughing and crying at the same time. The end of the year is approaching so this really hits home. As much as I look forward to the summer it is a sad but proud moment to pass these kids up to the next grade. To the rest of their lives.
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